What is a profile picture? That one picture that you want the world to look at in the million and one pages like twitter, facebook, Google, Glipho and this and that you have logged into….Your way of saying “This is me.” Since this is the best you believe you could offer to the world (other than your words), your profile picture or the absence of it can give away a lot…like say if you are casual in life, can you take life head on, are you a career person or just doing time pass…do you take this profile seriously…and yes it is your photo and you put it up so it must mean something to you. So here are a few things that your profile picture tells the world:
The portrait: face and till the midriff.1.Frontal face eyes focused straight: You are confident, well adjusted and ready to face any troubles.
2. Frontal face with a big smile : Confident yet childish, too optimistic..trying hard to please.3. Side face : hiding something even as you show your good side.
4. Frontal but chin up: arrogant, overconfident, overbearing, difficult to suffer your presence....I don’t need anyone types…..be careful. You cannot live alone and never ever win alone.
5. Frontal but chin down : confident yet there is something embarrassing you at the moment.
6. Showing too much of skin: desperate, lonely.7. Showing too less: prude, narrow minded…worried what the world thinks of you.
8. Dressed up in suit: trying to sell me something?
9. Dressed in T shirt: friendly and an open mind. Buttoned up till your chin: there is no way you will let the world into your heart.
10. Hands crossed in front : defensive…hey, I am not wanting to pick up a fight.
11. Hands crossed up in front and chin up: arrogant, self-serving. Why are you looking there? am I invisible .12. Slouched : bored…doing it for the heck of it..or just tired or beaten down by circumstances.
13. Arched back : tensed, anxious, type A character. Who is holding a gun to you?
14. too much make up: trying to sell something? your Head, body or soul when you have sold it already.
15. just enough: confident, frank, playing on an even field.
16. no make up: don’t give a damn to your world.
1. Nature : tell me you go outdoors at least once a while and that is not a fake studio background! It’s real? You should have got your photograph clicked with your car..I would believe you more.
2. White, Black background: no nonsense.
3. Elaborate curtains/painting : exhibiting affluence? In a hotel room? Loves luxuries, good things and hopes to get there someday.
4. Sitting on a sofa : comfortable, hands rested on the back : don’t give you a damn.
5. Leaning forward : interested in the outcome of the photo? Trying to impress someone…mobile photos with you leaning forward appearing like an astronaut in a space shuttle: seriously? that should be strictly for friends or NASA and not on profile!
6. With a sky background : dreamy…get realistic.
7. Window in background : hopeful, waiting for something.
8. Near the door : want to escape? This is no trap!
9. Face hidden by hair : you might look hot for someone but hiding something from the past….what’s bothering?
10. cropped hair for the photo: playful.
11. let the length of hair show: waiting to get committed.
12. tight ponytail : no nonsense.
13. too many highlights: lack of confidence..trying to exhibit it by masking in superiority complex. Want to be a model? Actress? Lose the highlights and get a chin tuck!
1. with pets: lonely…of course you love your pets but hope they don’t take too much priority.
2. with a particular tree or flower : that’s a definite nature lover and romantic too. Waiting for that knight to sweep you off your two feet? Be careful there are lot of idiots dressed like knights out there!
3. hidden amidst nature and face almost blurred : private, confidential…should I sigh a non disclosure clause before I talk to you. Playing hide and seek, hiding physical disability? shy..like a stealthy hunter?…of course you want to be discovered and even elated to glory but I have to find you amidst the flora! Come on don’t behave like a tiger in the jungle!
4. Amidst office: where is your family? Far and away? Untouched? What did you do to your family that they did this to you? Why love your little cabin so much? Your job is your life, really? Get a real life….and by the way don’t love your office try loving your work..that way when your boss kicks you out your will not be heartbroken.
5. With family..wife and kids: committed, reliable and in a warm cocoon.
6. With friends: hugging your friends too tight? Peer pressure? Possessive or pretentious…standing a little away…is that just an acquaintance? Drinks and cigarettes in hand : have fun now you will pay for it latter…someday!
7. with lover : show off. Who are you trying to get back at? Your ex? Bitchy friends?
8. with husband/wife: he/she sure love you enough to share a profile picture! No friends left of your own? Family is all there is…that can get lonely after sometime.
9. with things: guitar, bookcase, dolls, posters….dirty dishes? Well you are what you hold close to your heart! It is good that you love books or your music but if you are not promoting your own book or music then…seriously? Need I tell you to get a life and a living?
10. with a T shirt with slogans: opinionated, closed head or dragging attention to your pseudo confidence…do you have extra nipples?
11. sitting or standing in one corner: controlling manipulative.12. in the center of the room : won’t let anyone in? want the whole thing for yourself? Jealousy…the green monster will eat you from inside….desperately competitive.
13. lying on some lawn or amidst flowers: playful..you think life is a picnic? that is fine if you are young but if you are even 25 or above and a professional..life is not a picnic, get serious.
Up, close and impersonal photos1. very close ...too close..just a little of your face shows: you don’t want to be recognized but hope to be…you want me to work for your friendship..giving too much importance to yourself, darling? Is that just shy? Always nice to people…why? Who hurt you in school? Bullied? Too nice to people will get annoying someday, for you as well as for others.
2. lips and hands : lusty
3. eyes: aware, suspicious.
4. legs: inviting
5. feet, shoes: want to go someplace or run away from someplace?
College / childhood photo: that the last best thing that happened to you? still stuck there mentally and emotionally even as you grew physically in both length and breadth?
Your work as profile: trying too hard to prove you are successful in what you do? There is an inferiority complex somewhere…get rid of it…before it eats up your career…and for God sake show me your face.
Celebrity photo : why is the entire you hiding? Not looking good? Too short? Big nose? Pimples? Murdered someone?
The full length
1. Face blurred body too far, almost blending with the surroundings: camouflage , everyone knows what camouflage is meant for. You are the hunter or being hunted. Who? KGB? NSA? Or past friends or ex something?
2. Hands behind: have an ace up your sleeve? Or did you just pick up something that is not yours? What did mommy tell you? Show me your hands!
3. hands in front: shy, hiding the crotch?
4. hands on hips: want a fight? Aggressive.
5. in pockets : nervous. Thief.
6. don’t know where to put your hands…that’s why when you get a standing full frontal you are either with friends spread across each other in fun or with your boss squeezed and hiding your crotch because you know he can hurt you.
7. sitting photo with crossed legs : closed to interaction.
8. one leg over another: closed to all arguments…firm in what he/she has already decided. It’s dangerous in a business meeting or an interview.
9. Both legs spread : too comfortable, bossy, overbearing.
10. legs stuck together: shy, almost asking to be pushed around !
11. legs just spread, not exactly but almost parallel to each other: comfortable, confident.
12. resting on toes : in a hurry.
Ok I can go on and on but you will get bored…let me tell you with every single bad quality there are at least five good qualities. So if I have written something bad about you be assured I could sing paeans of you but then I will be writing a 300 page book!
What is the ideal photograph? The one that will impress your target : will write about it in the next blog.