A few weeks
back a 18
year old came
for consultation. A suicide
attempt. Why? His girlfriend
dumped him. He
was heartbroken.
Yesterday he comes
back all happy. Why? He has found a new
girl friend.
I am forced
to be happy
for him…because he
will not understand
the essence of
love. You are
heartbroken you need
a immediate remedy….what?
another love. Well, it
has manifold results…you
are happy again and
you
get your revenge
on that old girlfriend
/ boyfriend. And of course
the other side
is also in the
competition.
Has to be……if
you are competing
with me I have
to compete with
you!
The entire concept
of love has
changed drastically in
the past few
years. There are
thousands of such
cases especially among
the young….they keep
falling in love again and
again…..like changing jobs.…..the
first heart break
and we become
suspicious….the second heart
break., the third…….soon trust
goes out of
the window and
soon they find
true love embarrassing…a burden .
Falling in love
is no longer hard
on knees. It is
about calculation and
momentary happiness. Even
while in love
we keep looking
out for a
better bargain in
the horizon.
More times than
not Love is
rebound love.
So, what happens
to us when
we lose trust…the
basic foundation of
society?
Men love being
called studs while women now
want to
compete with them. Instead of
letting men know
it is not
OK to be in and
out of loveless
relationships everyone is
busy copying
the concept of
studness.
Lovers with no
strings…friends with no
string…families with no
strings…. is becoming the
norm.
What I fail
to understand is
how can we
live with no
strings attached? Everything anyone
does anywhere in
this world has
a ripple effect….yes,
sometimes the ripples
are not that
big but still…we
are all tied
by unseen strings
to each other
throughout the world.
But does falling
in and out
of love prevents
us from suffering
the pain of
heartbreak? On the outside
it looks like
that…the pinch feels
less with every
breakup…we get numb
and that encourages
the behavior.
So is being numb
better than being
heartbroken? No. it is
not.
Every single heart
break hardens our
hearts to the
world. Yes, we might
feel the pinch
a little less
but it effects
our outlook. It changes
our overall
behavior.
Hearts have hardened.
We have become
calculating.
Every single emotion
is give and
take…a type of
bargaining. We love our dogs
and cats but
love another human? How can
we trust anyone? it
is time and money
waste.
Love is about being
stuck together forever….Yuck, as if
it is a
disease.
Then there has
to be an
exit strategy…..like it
is a business….because there
is something better.
Yes, there will
always be something better
in the horizon…there
will always be
someone richer, more
beautiful …it might be
better but is
it right for
you?
Yes, when we
see a romantic
movie most of us immediately
say, “It happens only
in movies. Not
in real life. ”
Everyone killing everyone
will guns and
whatnot seems more
reasonable.
Whose fault is
that anyway?
“Not us, it’s
the world that
is getting mean.”
We want true
love but we
are not ready
to take the
risk of giving
it.
Someone talks about
true love….it is
embarrassing….you write a
romance? Yuck. You want
to see a
romance movie? Yuck…...why?
We are a generation of
shortcuts. And the new
generation is getting
more creative as
long as shortcuts
are concerned.
The quality of
love has gone
down and quantity
of love has
gone up.
So, now even
before we shake
hands we get
suspicious of each
other.
There is a huge
trust
deficit.
Even before we
fall in love
we look out
for something to
fall back on.
And then we
fall in love
again…..heartbroken and carrying
a huge baggage
of mistrust.
Yes, if this
goes on at
this pace we
all will all
live carrying our
broken hearts hidden
so deep even
we won’t realize
what it is
doing at our
outlook of life
and this world
……and then we
will die lonely
for sure.
and yes, don't forget to calculate your love on the love calculator! and please go ahead and buy the cheap gift...not the expensive one or else you will have to regret the money spend on a worthless person.
so, is this falling in and out of love with impunity resilience or avoidance of responsibility and risk?
so, is this falling in and out of love with impunity resilience or avoidance of responsibility and risk?
only women think about love when they are in it. my experience is that men rarely think about love, they feel it when they are in it and it sometimes makes them lose their minds...
ReplyDeletemaybe it's true...but nowadays things have changed drastically. thanks for reading and taking the time to comment.
ReplyDelete